The Danagers of The Family Life

i have been physically injured on multiple occasions since i've been a wife and mother. so many time so, that i can say with confidence that being a wife and mother is a dangerous job. yesterday i was hurt yet again, while mothering. i cried. i stood at the driver's side of the car and just sobbed. my feelings were hurt and my leg was bleeding onto my work dress.

therefore, i've decided to put together this list both as a warning to want-to-be and new parents. it's that bright yellow WARNING label that should come on babies and husbands.

1) scrapped my entire back on concrete while saving my oldest son from a bike accident at the park
2) while carrying my oldest son i tripped over a curb and then fell back first onto said curb
3) burned ALL 10 of my finger tips making a school project
4) scalded un-countable times trying to cook
5) kicked, scratched, hair pulled, peed on etc. . . . .

i am scared. so so so very scared.

The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold

Alice Sebold round two did not go well for me. Unfortunately, I gave up on The Almost Moon almost at the very beginning. Not literally, since I was several chapters into the book. However, the main character (not memorable) had not moved from the same location since page one.

I think it should have been flashbacks with the occasional back to reality. However, ended up more like reality with the occasional flashback and it was very slow paced. The story is about caring for an elderly parent. A tough job.

I wish I could have stuck it out to see what happened. So, if you know, please fill me in on the ending. In the meantime, I'll wait for the movie.

stuck in the mud

funny story.
our house falls to pieces when it rains. everything that could go wrong will go wrong with that house when it raining outside. we have a terrible driveway. cracked right down the middle so that there's this hump in the middle and a ditch on either side. when it rains both the side ditches will fill up with MUD. they've progressively gotten worse. now its not just a little mud its more like two small muddy ponds.

this morning i ran to 7-11 for some milk and then was just going to quickly drop off the milk at home and then shoot off to work. instead of parking out in the street, or in the driveway ocean, i parked right in the freakin' yard. right up to the porch almost. so then when i went to leave i back out and didn't hit cement, but mud. the car got stuck right away. the more i tried to back out the deeper i dug myself. before i knew it, the tires were spinning and shooting mud 15 feet into the air!

after several "creative" attempts to free my car, we gave up. it is still there. . . in the front yard (and half way into the neighbor's yard).

help me.

toby's hair

we tried. we really did. the plan was to grow it out and see if it would eventually fall into a cascade of flowing curls. he would be like a young joe jonas. but it didn't work out. more and more he was looking like a young corbin blue. yikes! nobody wants that look. so we cut it. now. . . well now, tobias is the splitting image of his brother and no one else. i think that we should keep it at a medium length. not to long and definitely not to short.

2010 Resolutions (3)

1) i'm doing Pilates this year. the first week is over and my @$$ hurts. not like a figurative @$$, but literally. my butt hurts. there must be some muscles there that i've never in my 30-years of life never ever used. sitting in those classes is really embarrassing right now. i'd like to think that i'm not in terrible shape. (ok a 5 on a scale of 1 -10. 10 being like an Iron Man). the very basic in Pilates is very difficult for me. i cannot do the basic roll up. a roll-up is where you get into the sitting position from the laying position using only your "core". lay down flat on your back now roll upwards, arms extended and sit up. . . not as easy as it sounds. nor is it as easy as all those women in my class make it look.

well i'm only 1 week in so my first Pilates goal is a freakin' ROLL UP.

2) i am going to second hand all that i can. clothes, books, furniture, anything. i've shopped second hand for years, but i'm going to try to do it for as many items as possible this year. both as a way to save money and also as a statement toward American over consumption. the tendency in America is to buy new. well, (because its FUN). but. . . i want to have my shoes repaired. i want to cook from scratch. i want to hit yards sales for my new sofa this year.

there may be many of times that i buy from the mall still but i'm gonna try my best and see how it goes.

3) i have been making this one for about 4 years in a row now. but. . . i will pay off the ol' credit card. i only have one but i've taken full advantage of it.

i stopped using it about 6 months ago, so now i just have to pay pay pay pay!

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

So while at the movies recently, I saw the preview for the movie "The Lovely Bones". I'd see this book on the Target bookshelves for months, but never gave it a second thought. Once I saw the synopsis, I had to have the book! After many library checks and a few tries at my local Half Price, I finally found a copy. (It killlls me to pay full price for just about anything.)

Side Note: After buying the book, I found a free copy online at Google Books .com.

The story follows Susie Salmon from her tragic murder, to her stay in "her the-in-between" and finally to heaven. She watches her family deal with her death. All of them suffering in their own way. Her death is the death of her family as a it was. They will never be the same again. She's torn between moving on and staying glued to the happenings down on earth. So the reader gets to see her mother, father, sister and brother all grow and move on. Susie stays closest to her sister's life because she sees her sister's life as the closest thing she could compare her could-have-been-life to. Susie is proudest of her sister and happy with her life's accomplishments and journey. Her mother and father fall apart and her baby brother is just lost in the shuffle of it all.

Susie also watches her killer. It's a weird situation for her. It is like a terrible gruesome accident on the side of the road, horrific and yet its hard to look away. She watches him hoping that he'll be caught. Hoping that no others will die and that her murder will be justified.

I enjoyed reading Alice Sebolds take on heaven as I have always imagined it very similarly. As a place where there is safety and happiness, but still a great connection to earth. My imaginary heave would be like watch television only the main characters would be all the people from my life that I'd miss so much. It was a tragic story of a child's murder, but it never felt too sad. It felt safe. Which is how I'd like to imagine death. Death should not be sad or scary, but safe.